LOVE vs LOGIC

Well most people can probably figure out that I am a very logical person. Its true. I think alot but feel as little as possible! Ok not feel per say but emotional stuff is not my best attribute!! I think that everything in life has a logical explanation!
Well as you can imagine I have a had HUGE life lesson to learn that this is NOT true!
 Everything in life DOES not have logical explanations.
We face situations in life that defy logic, that are purely emotional. Its funny I realized that I actually surrounded myself with friends who are emotional life dwellers(HAHA-that sounds so funny) but they are. They feel their way through life completely with very little logic involved. I find this so odd because I am exactly the opposite!
It seems there are no accidents and these people were definitely placed in my life for a reason. SO I COULD LEARN what they know!!
What do they know-they aren't logical?
Well they know how to love. Unconditionally without thought or concern for themselves.
They know how to be vulnerable and accepting of love and not worry about the heartache that MIGHT happen.
They know how to believe and hope for tomorrow and for love and for solutions.
They have faith in things unseen because they feel it, not because they KNOW it.
They know how to hurt and how to experience and let the hurt in and how to process and release it. They know how to ask for help when they are hurting and how to accept that help.
They know how to accept their emotions with no conditions just taking them as they are and moving on with them.
Yes I have learned alot from my emotional counterpart's. I appreciate these lessons and as I reflect more on these difference I shall in fact write some more. I find it fascinating the difference between logic and love.
If you have followed this blog you know that I have dealt with secondary infertility-yes there is a label-not infertility but secondary-since I have children-although it was NOT easy to get them here either! However, after 8 years of no babies, I am still not completely healed from the pain of NO!

Clearly the answer is NO about me having more children, I do not know why and apparently the lesson is in that. That I do not know why. No matter how much I want a logical explanation, there is not one to find. No matter how badly I want to understand a flaw in myself or something I did wrong to deserve this or how much I want to be mad at God for making this happen-it will not change any of this, and there is no logical way to fix it. It just is!
It just is!
Is it possible that there is such a thing as, JUST IS!!
I have decided there must be things in life that just happen-and you cannot explain it away in order to make yourself feel better. You just have to accept that it is how it is and deal with the situation and emotions and move on. Otherwise you will be bitter and hardened.
I know because I have spent a few years trying so hard to become un-bitter and it is not easy.
I believe that it is only now that I am starting to see that the bitterness inside of me is mine to deal with on an emotional level that sometimes crying clears our eyes out so we can see clearly what is in front of us. I have figured out that pouring your heart out to someone and not just paper really does help to put things into perspective. I have learned that it is OK TO HURT! It is ok to be sad, it is ok to be in emotional pain, it is ok to be weak, it is ok to be vulnerable, it is ok to feel!!! IT is ok to FEEL it really is ok to FEEL!!!! If you understood what a huge weight that is off my shoulders, to understand that I have given myself the right to feel and to be sad and to be weak and to be vulnerable-to let down some of these guards and to start to show pieces of my heart to the world, if you understood what a relief that is. It is so hard to always be the rock, the strong one-sometimes I am just not strong and sometimes I don't want to be.
I have learned that Love does NOT fix everything-neither does logic Love does not pay the bills, but love does give us hope for our tomorrows and the ability to hold on to that hope and let go of the fear! Logic pays the bills, logic satisfies the mind for an answer, logic can answer so many questions but it does not give you hope for tomorrow-it may give you directions on how to achieve things tomorrow but not the hope that you will arrive! Love gives you hope!!! Love gives you freedom!!! Love and logic-there is a balance that needs to be met and I am on my way to finding that balance!!!! I will let you know when I get there!!!
Blessings
Niki B
















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